Thursday, June 12, 2008

Do you fart?

I've always liked to think that in a past life I was once a princess. (I also think I was a cat and bee but we'll not talk about that now.) I can see me sitting in my darling new pink silk gown drinking tea with Mama and making small talk about the weather and the latest play we just attended. Beauty and leisure surround me and I am free to live as I please. Forwarding to reality, I'd like to tell you a little story about my "proper" self. Let me set the scene for you: Mother and son sitting all sweet and cozy on the couch together. Adoringly she looks at her sweet little boy. His full attention is on the TV while little talking Disney bugs run wild across the screen. The room quiets and a soft "toot" fills the air. The mother smiles and says "excuse me." Thinking that all is good she once again turns her attention to the television. After a few moments she feels someone staring at her. It's a long heavy stare. It could only be one person and he is staring, in shock, with a wondering, confused look on his face. You can see the wheels turning in his little head. He wants to say something but just doesn't know what to say. For a good 20 seconds he stares her down with a look of astonishment. Finally he says "girls fart too!?" The mother is rather amused by this comment. She is actually surprised that it took him 41/2 years to figure it out. So sweetly she says (trying not to laugh) "Gavin, everyone farts." He rolls this around in his head for awhile. He looks back to his movie and continues to watch it. After about three minutes he looks back at his mother and for the next ten minutes tells her every thing he remembers about everyone, animals included, that has ever farted in front of him. All she could do is smile and say again, "Yup, everyone farts."
Pretty funny story huh! Of course it's true. Of course it happened to me and my sweet little man. I couldn't believe he saw me in such a light. He was so honest about his question/discovery I could do nothing but giggle at him. To think that he has lived thinking that he was the only one who could push gas out of his butt! Mikayla must really have him convinced that "he did it" all the time! I ruined that one for her. He knows our secret. Girls fart too.

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